When partnering with your family to know, love, and follow Jesus, we strive to create and share content filtered by the Head-Heart-Hands model.
Head: the knowledge of God and His Word | Heart: the personal connection from scripture | Hands: a missional mindset
HEAD
(James 1:19)
I love the book of James. It’s actually a letter written by Jesus’s very own earthly brother, James! He wrote this letter to encourage Jesus Followers who were being bullied by people who did not know, love, or follow Jesus. James encouraged them to endure (remember that word from Monday?). He urged them to keep on following Jesus even though times were hard. James challenged them to keep on telling others the never-changing Good News about Jesus.
His whole letter is filled with simple advice about how to follow Jesus and love all people well. But, just because it’s simple doesn’t mean it is always easy to DO the things James encourages us to.
The verse we’re looking at today is a great example of this! Let’s read it together. Can you have someone in your family read James 1:19? “My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry…”
What three things did James say we should do? (Be quick to listen, slow to speak, slow to become angry.) That’s right! Let’s think about each of these together.
HEART
Be Quick to Listen: This means we work hard to let others know we hear what they are saying. Have you ever felt unheard? Maybe a friend at school was distracted when you were telling a story or a parent kept cooking or reading or scrolling on social media when you trying to tell them something important to you —Ouch! This never feels good. What about you? Have you ever been the one not listening when someone is talking? When we give our full attention to a friend or parent or teacher or coach who is talking, we show them we care about what they have to say and we care about them!
How can we show someone we are listening to what they say?
Why is it sometimes hard to listen to our friends, parents, teachers, or coaches?
Be Slow To Speak: This means that as we listen (to truly understand the other person), we work hard not to interrupt, and we pause to think before we speak. Pausing before we speak helps us think about what has been said to us and gives us an opportunity to think about what we might say in response, and then choose our words wisely.
What might it look like to pause and think before we speak?
Why is it sometimes hard to have a quiet mouth when others are talking?
Be Slow to Anger: We all feel angry sometimes. Feeling anger isn’t the problem; it’s what we do with our angry feelings that can be the challenge. James reminds us to be patient when we begin to feel angry. In other words, when we are with a friend or family member and we notice our bodies tense up and our heart starts to race, we might be getting angry and it’s wise to slow things down and remember the first two things (be quick to listen and slow to speak). We can pause and take a breath first, then choose to respond wisely instead of using our words or our bodies to hurt someone else when we feel angry.
Why is it sometimes hard to manage our anger in a helpful way with our friends, parents, teachers, or coaches?
Ultimately, James is saying that we love the people in our lives well when we listen, use our words wisely, and care for our angry feelings in helpful ways.
HANDS
Sometimes, having a gentle reminder that I can see helps me remember important things like this in a challenging moment. I wonder if your family can come up with a sign for each of these important things (quick to listen, slow to speak, slow to anger) so that when someone needs a loving reminder, someone else might give them a quick sign to help them through!
Think about a baseball coach who uses signals to let his players know what to do in a particular situation. He might rub his belly or pull his ear, or wipe his arm. What signs can you guys come up with for when you need a gentle reminder to listen well, or pause and think before you speak, or be patient in your anger? (Tug on our own ear, point to the mouth or take a deep breath as a reminder to breathe when we begin to feel anger?)
Prayer: Dear God, thank You for listening to us when we pray. Thank You for all the wise words You give us in Your Word. Thank You for always being patient with us! Help us to love others well by listening, choosing our words wisely, and being patient, even when we feel angry.