Well, listen, we wanna welcome you guys and I mean, wherever you're watching today, if you're one of our campuses, uh, you can see that the stage looks a little different today, and I need you to just take a deep breath. Don't worry. I mean, we are gonna kind of do some therapy up here, but not out there. And so this is just a day for you to kinda watch and listen and lean in to what I hope is a conversation that really begins to equip you in some things that I think are gonna be really, really helpful. Alright, y'all, we're, we're in a series, you know, this series, it's called Hide It or Heal It.

And the reality is most of us lean much more towards the hide it side of things than we do stepping in to allow God to begin to heal it. And I want you to know, one of the reasons I've been really excited about today is because today we're gonna, we're gonna tackle a subject or topic that I think applies to everyone listening. And it either applies to you directly or indirectly. Okay? Um, I know from my family, this is something we've walked through, and so I've just, man, I think there's gonna be some weight to today.

Um, and I think there's gonna be some tools given today that can really, really be helpful for you. And so that's kind of what we wanna do. I love it. Listen to me. I love it.

I love it when the church kind of stops all programming to speak directly into what you are dealing with day in, day out. And I think that's what's happening in this conversation today. We've had a lot of feedback online, and so welcome to all of you online. Today we're talking about the biggest health problem in the world. The number one health problem in the world is depression and anxiety.

And today we're gonna dive into that conversation. Now, uh, as much as I would love to kinda share some things I've learned in this journey, I knew when we first said this is where we're going with today, that we needed to bring in the experts, okay? And so that's who I have on the stage with me. But I also know this about you because I kind of tried this. I kind of did a trial run in my house, church.

I have a really big house church, and it almost feels like a Sunday morning sometimes. But Wednesday night in my house, church, I brought up the two words we're talking about today, mental health. And can I tell you, the air just in the room went, like it was, it was all of a sudden, everybody just kinda locked up on me a little bit. And so I need you to know, like, I need you to just kind of take a deep breath. Like, it's okay, okay?

This is just a discussion that's meant to bring you one thing today and it's comfort and hope. All right? So that's where we're going today. You don't need to be worried or anxious about that. I need to give you a little bit of peace because we're just gonna equip you to really deal with what you're already dealing with.

It's just nobody's talking about it. And today, man, I'm so thankful that we are at a church that says we're gonna stop all that we're doing here, and we're gonna speak directly into what you and I are really dealing with in our homes and in our lives. All right? So let me introduce these folks to you because they're gonna help us do this. So, uh, this is Brandy.

Many of you already know Brandy, especially at the Lincoln Road Campus, maybe at our other campuses are watching online. Uh, listen, Brandy has worked with us for about 10 years and, um, man, her, her heart, her passion is counseling. I mean, she just loves those moments. Um, she used to be a counselor before she came on staff with us here at Lincoln Road. Many of you have begun listening to our podcast.

If you haven't yet, you can do it on the app. It's called Unschooled and Ordinary. And that's one of the voices that you hear. Now you're just putting a face with it. All right?

Uh, Brandy and Witt, her husband are also house church pastors over in Petal. And man, she is a mom of two incredible kids. And, uh, man, we're so thankful for Brandy here. And then this is Lee and, uh, yeah, right, man, we, we love Lee. And, um, if you've been at our church for a long time, man, Lee helped us what we now call Care Ministry.

That happens on Tuesday nights. Been some incredible things are happening Tuesday nights and Care Ministry. But that began kind of with Lee's insight. Lee's a counselor, he is gotta practice in the Oxford area and flow wood and in Jackson. And man, I'm gonna tell you, he is just a real role model of mine.

He's, he's the guy I call for advice. I dunno if you've got somebody like that, but man, Lee has so much wisdom, his wife and his three kids are here today. And so, uh, man Lee's got a lot to share as well. We worked together for a season. We both worked at Pine Lake for a season together, and now we just kind of get to hang out.

Uh, once a year. We always take a men's strip together and I get to hear some insight from Lee. But lemme do this. I'm gonna start this kind of conversation off with what I'm gonna give you just as a theme verse to kinda anchor our conversation around, okay? You ever just need a starting place Like here, here's just the starting place when it comes to this conversation about anxiety and depression.

I want you to hear God's word to kind of be the beginning point, okay? This is second Corinthians one, three, and four. Here's what it says. It says, praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the father of compassion, and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all of our troubles so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. Now, that's a lot of comfort in that two sentences, but the idea there, and the thing we're gonna point you back to over the next 25 minutes is that we go to God for comfort and he gives that to us, even if that feels impossible in the moment that you're in.

And he equips us and he gives us some tools and he sends us out as people that give comfort to others. Alright? So let's see if we can kind of put a plan to that, put some words to that and, and allow these two to kind of help us in this conversation. Here we go. You okay?

Alright. Hey y'all, let me ask you guys, uh, uh, Lee, let's kind of kick this thing off. Um, because here's the reality. When you hear anxiety and depression, uh, they're a dynamic duo. That can be really difficult.

But I don't know that we have a definition of what that really is. So let's start with this question. Uh, what are anxiety and depression exactly. And how does anxiety and depression differ from just worry and maybe sadness? Hmm.

That's a good, it's a really good question. I want you to think about this church God gave us at the moment of salvation. He gave us a gift called the Holy Spirit. And that Holy Spirit is there to guide us as, to lead us, as to keep us connected with him. And he's also given us other resources, other tools to navigate life with, just like you we're, we're all friends.

Relationships are a big part of that. But he's given us a specific set of tools that operate like the dashboard of your car called emotions. And these emotions are just simply there to let us know how we're experiencing the world around us. But in a healthy, perfect world, we would experience the world around us. We would let the Holy Spirit guide us and lead us and how to navigate life through it.

And we could kind of work through things a lot more easily. Here are two dangers, all right? When it comes to emotions, Craig, there are two kind of dangers. Danger number one is this, we can detach from our emotion. What does that mean?

It just means simply that we can get busy, we can get distracted, we can kind of just pretend whatever's going on in life away. And that's kind of one way we could do it. The second danger is we can drown in what we are feeling. And that's just where we're all up in our fields. We can't make sense of anything.

And so quite simply put, anxiety is when your emotions have kind of now gone into overdrive. It's gone beyond just typical sadness or anger or loneliness. These are common emotions that are healthy for us all to feel. But when our emotions get hijacked because we're detaching or drowning, anxiety and depression can now enter our life and we experience disruption. Think about Mary and Martha.

Remember when they were at the feet of Jesus? And remember why Jesus was sitting there and Mary was at his feet. Martha, my girl up in the kitchen, she cooking up a mess of food. She getting crankier by the second and she's letting everybody around her know it. That's a picture of anxiety because anxiety allows your emotions to get very, very overreactive.

And then you get overaged in life. Depression is quite the opposite. Depression is more. Think David in Psalm 51, David is crying out before the Lord. He's broken from some of his choices in his life and he says, God, restore into me the joy of my salvation.

And if, if anxiety creates an over engagement of emotions, depression is where our emotions get very blunted and we begin to disengage in life. That's Good. Yeah. So one thing that we did this week was we wanted to hear from our venture people, Hey, we could have looked at any survey. It would've told us, Hey, this is what depression feels like.

This is what anxiety feels like. But I feel like it's more powerful when it comes from you. So we asked if you could describe it, put it into words, what does anxiety feel like? And if you are a visual person, I feel like these paint such a picture. So I'd like to read some of those for you.

It says anxiety feels like bricks on my chest. A constant fight or flight, a runaway train, suffocating, drowning, anger and rage. I'm having a heart attack. It's something I can't escape. Overwhelming and frantic out of control, adrenaline.

And this last one always kind of stops me. 'Cause it says it feels like death. And so if you've never struggled with anxiety, let that paint a picture for you. When someone is sitting across from you and saying, Hey, this is something I struggle with. It's not just nervousness, it's not just worry.

It's these things. That's how it feels inside your body. And then on the opposite end of that spectrum is depression. And some of the things you said, depression feels like I shouldn't even exist. Zero energy, hopelessness, apathy.

I'm in a deep dark cave. Numbness being underwater, I'm never worthy enough. Isolation, smothering, sadness, emotional bluntness. I'm trapped in a black hole. Mm-Hmm.

So genuinely where just as Lee said, anxiety is all of these like frantic feelings in your body. Mm-Hmm. Depression. Is this like a heavy blanket's been thrown over you and I can't get it off? Mm-Hmm.

You know, that list really helps me. And, and I maybe I'm kind of visual and I need to see those words laid out because I've, I've heard that so many times. I feel anxious, I feel depressed. And, and like, if I had to make the list of what it feels like to be dyslexic, I, I could make that list really well for you. Mm-Hmm.

You know, like, here's what it's like. But when it's putting words to anxiety and depression, that, that men, for me, there's seasons that I feel that, but it's not as much of a common struggle that really helps me have some empathy and understand where people are in the midst of that. So let's, let's get, let's go a little deeper on that. Like, so what causes anxiety and depression to start and stick in my life? Alright.

And then what can we do to begin to be healthier? We know as, as Christians, we know we're, we're made in God's image, right? There are three parts to God. There's a father, there's a son, there's a Holy Spirit. And you and I have three parts as well.

And Paul, in one Thessalonians 5 23, he kind of talks about these three different parts that we have. We have a spirit, we have a soul, and we have a body. And what I want you to understand is like with, with depression and anxiety, it can originate in any of those three parts of our life. It may start in our spirit, it may begin in our soul, or it could begin in our body. But watch this church.

Once it gets kicked off, it begins to infiltrate all three parts of our life. So can we just break these down really quickly? Let's talk about the spiritual part of this. So we believe as believers that prior to Jesus and salvation, there's a part of our life that's just a vacuum. It's an open hole.

Then that's where the Holy Spirit at salvation comes. And he saves us and he fills us literally with his spirit. So if I'm a nonbeliever, if I don't have Christ in me, or maybe I have been walking with the Lord, but I find myself detached from him, I'm just, maybe I have unconfessed sin in my life that can also create some anxiety and depression. But watch this, this is real. It is very normal for us to get angry with God at times.

You ever been angry with God? I have. You don't understand why he's not moving in a particular way. I keep praying in a particular prayer and I don't see resolution to that. And, and all of that.

Our spirit can get grieved in that to the point where anxiety and depression begin to occur. So another important aspect to breaking down these three is that regardless of where it originates, there may be some different things that we have to do to get healthier to answer that part of the question. So when it originates in our spirit, a couple of things just really practical that can help begin bringing you out of that. And look, the first question that came to my mind was, well, how am I supposed to know which one it started in? Well, that's where our licensed professional counselors like Lee, especially Christian counselors, they are trained to help you determine like, Hey, which of these three areas do we need to target?

Maybe it's all three at once, you don't know, but you have to have someone to kind of help you sort through that sometimes. So if it's started in the spirit, there's two things I'd like to talk about that could practically help us begin to come out of that. And the first is to practice gratitude. And I know that sounds so simple, but I want you to really think about it. When you are in the depths of depression where that blanket is over you, you're in the deep dark cave, you can't see out of it.

Gratitude is the last thing on your mind. When that runaway train is going in anxiety, it's almost impossible to stop and think through a different perspective. But gratitude, we see it's biblical. It's something that we need to practice. And so in Philippians four, I love that Paul says he is not speaking of being in need, but he has learned in whatever situation he's found himself in to be content.

And then it tells us again, and Thessalonians to rejoice, always pray without ceasing and to give thanks when in all circumstances. And so it's just one tiny thing. But look, some pen and paper to do that physical work of thinking of some things that you can be grateful for is a really easy way to start that journey. And then also, this is something that God has continued to remind me of this year, um, is to practice solitude. And I love to be alone.

I am an introvert. It's how I recharge. That's not the same thing as solitude. When we practice solitude, that is being one-on-one alone before God. And I'm a mom.

I've got a 9-year-old, a 4-year-old, and I know that all your parents out there are like, yeah, right to solitude. But God keeps coming back to me and saying, Hey, those anxious thoughts you have, they're never gonna go away until you can find time to do. As I tell you in Matthew six, Matthew six, six, Jesus said, when you pray, go into your room. And I always read this like all caps and shut the door. The Bible literally tells us that.

So those are two practical things when we're struggling in our spirit, that it's, it sounds overly simple, but it can be really, really hard in those moments. So mm-hmm, Yeah. When you think about the soul piece of us, right? That's kind of a mister, kinda like a mysterious kind of part of our life. But really your soul is just your thoughts, your emotions, your desires, um, care to venture.

How many thoughts a day? You have two thousands. Thousands and thousands of thoughts. And and this was some recent research that came out that said, of the thousands of thoughts you and I have every single day, two thirds of the things we think about are negative in nature. Why is that so important?

When you look at Proverbs 23, 7, it says, as you think, so, you become, think about that as you think. So you become, we literally think ourselves into a reality church. If we're thinking anxiously, if we're thinking hopelessly, if we're thinking all these types of things over and over and over again, at some point it begins to become how we experience life. And so, taking our thoughts captive, Paul said, take every single thought captive and bring it under the submission of Christ. And why that's so important is 'cause I'm telling you, nearly two thirds of the things you think about, they're not true.

They're just not true. So that's one of the things I struggle with anxiety, if y'all haven't caught onto that yet. Um, and one of the things that so practically helped was to have a counselor, uh, was a counselor who needed a counselor to help me even be aware of what it was I was thinking. We have all these thoughts that Lee's talking about, and half the time I'm not even aware of what I'm thinking. There's just racing thoughts and all this craziness going on.

So two things practically here as well. So in Romans 12, two, it tells us that we have to transform our minds. We have to be renewed. It says be transformed by the renewal of your mind. So that tells me right there, that obviously there are gonna be times where my mind is not in the right place if it has to be renewed, then he already knew we were going to have these thoughts that weren't on track with where he wanted us to be.

And the most practical thing anyone ever did was the counselor sitting across from me was like, okay, and here's how we're gonna do this. Philippians four, eight. And she made me start reading it. So I did finally, brothers, whatever is true, she said, stop, we don't have to finish. Because that right there would solve almost every problem that you have in your mind.

Because like Lee said, most of the things we're thinking they're not even true. It's the the what ifs and what about this, and this could happen and that might happen. And then man, there goes that train, right? Speaking of the runaway train, I could have written that one. Whoever you were, we are soul sisters and brothers, whatever.

Mm-Hmm. Um, but to say, Hey, whatever is true, stop think on these things. If it's not true, it can't stay. You know, I love what Lee has said before, like when you start to think about your thoughts and brand kind of mentioned it just then maybe if you can capture yourself is does it begin with what if or does it begin with what is? And so many times we're in that camp of what if, you know, what if this happens, if you're a parent man, uh, two teenagers at my house.

Like, we think a lot about what if and it scares us. And then our thoughts go versus, hey, what is of God's truth? And uh, he's not gonna abandon us and he's with us. You know? That's right.

Lee going to the third part of that. Yeah. So the third part's our body, and this is really important, you know, I think this is overlooked as well, but um, our bodies are broken from sin. It's just straightforward. If you go to Forest General Hospital, you go to any clinic in this town right now, you're gonna find examples of our bodies being broken.

Why is cancer heart disease? Why do these things exist? It's not because it was God's plan. This is all part of a broken world. And you need to understand too, your brain is just like that.

Your brain has been affected by the fall of mankind. And so in a healthy place, your brain can produce healthy chemicals like serotonin, dopamine, these different chemicals that help us regulate life and feel good. And so church, I want you to hear me say sometimes it's important to recognize what I'm experiencing. If fixing anxiety or depression, it could be as a result of my physical body is just not functioning properly. And it's okay.

Can I say this? It's okay to go see your doctor and to be prescribed a medication. I take a pill every single night for cholesterol issues. All right? My hope is not in that pill.

My hope is always in Jesus. And yet I'm also thankful that God allows us resources like medication to help us regulate. So if you need to see your doctor, that could be a big part of this too. Mm-Hmm Mm-Hmm. I don't have much to add to that other than if you needed someone else to look you in the face and say it's okay to go see your doctor.

In fact, we recommend it. If that is where you are today, go. Yeah, That's a good word. Hey, listen. So some of you man, when when you hear anxiety and depression, you, you connect directly.

Like that's, you have felt it. You could have wrote the list. Hashtag anxiety feels like you know you're there. Others of you, maybe it's a reality that, uh, men, it's someone that you love in your life and they're walking through this. Maybe it's an employee at your office, right?

Maybe it's a man, a son or a daughter. Maybe it's your wife, your husband, a parent, whatever the description may be. And sometimes it can be a struggle to connect with them and understand how to encourage them. And so I want to kind of shift the conversation that way so that if it's not just firsthand, right? It's, it's, it's indirect, it's secondhand and there's someone in your life.

So, so lemme ask you this. How can I be a good friend to someone who is in that season where they're struggling with anxiety and Depression? That's a really good question. Hey, any visual people in the house? I'm a visual person.

I wanna give you a visual. This is gonna sound weird, but this is my visual for you, okay? I want you to imagine your life being lived out in a backyard, alright? And in your backyard you have a chain link fence that goes around the whole entire perimeter of your backyard. If you're married, your spouse's backyard is right next door to your backyard.

If you have kids, their backyards are right next to your backyard as well. If you're single, that'd be your family and your friends. But you get the picture right. We're all living in our own backyard with a fence around it. Here's why I give you that analogy.

When we see someone who's hurting, when we see a loved one who is just in pain or misery, we will typically do one of two things. We'll either try to jump the fence, get in their yard, start ripping up their weeds, prescribing for them everything they need to be doing and it doesn't work. The other drawback is sometimes we just pull back from their yard all together and we just do nothing outta fear of not knowing what to say. And what I would propose is there is a healthier way to do it. What if we just as believers walked up to each other's fence line regularly checked on each other, offered support, pray for them, pray with them, and commit to them, Hey, I'm not going anywhere until we walk through this season in your life.

Mm-Hmm. Craig, you and I have a really close friend. His name is Jody Schmelzer. And 15 years ago I lost my father, uh, about three o'clock in the morning at St. Dominic Hospital in Jackson.

I got to my house about 6, 6 30 that morning. Uh, after all that was over and I was, you can imagine, didn't sleep all, most of the night. It was just a hot mess. And up comes Jodi Schmelzer walking in our door that morning and he was just there knowing he couldn't take the pain away, but he just wanted to be with me in that moment. And we stood in our kitchen for maybe 20, 30 minutes and he left.

Listen to what he did. Hour later, Jodi shows up at our house. He's got breakfast in one hand and a box of light bulbs in the other. I'm like, what is that? He goes, dude, you gotta eat at some point.

And when I was here, I saw you had light bulbs that were out and I just wanna do something for you. And that's exactly a picture too. I see in one Kings chapter 17 with Elijah, Elijah had a death threat on his life. He was depressed, he was under a shade tree. He's suicidal.

He's literally, literally crying out to God, saying, God, take me out. And I love what God does for Elijah. It's exactly what Jodi did for me. He showed up, he cooked him a meal, told him to get a nap. When he woke up, he cooked him another meal, told him to get a nap.

And he just was with him and he just encouraged him. So if you have a loved one that's hurting, let me just challenge you. Walk up to their fence line, support them, love them, encourage them. Don't jump the fence and try to fix them, but just be present with them and if necessary, bring some light bulbs. So I think that paints such a beautiful picture, but I know there are some of you out there that are list makers instead of picture seers.

So for you guys, let's do just a really quick, some do's and don'ts. Some things that you should maybe say or do and some things that maybe you shouldn't say or do. We're gonna start with don't. So in these seasons when you're trying to care for someone you love, who is struggling with anxiety and depression, don't oversize it. Mm-Hmm.

I know we started back there with one of those things that could help you is you might need to spend more time with the Lord. But you know what doesn't help someone is for you to sit across from me and make me feel judged about the time that I'm spending with the Lord. Mm-Hmm. So don't oversize it with, well what does your quiet time look like right now? Maybe you should pray some more.

Maybe they should, but we'll get to some other ways. You could say that in a minute. Okay? Don't minimize. No matter what I have ever been through, I have never felt exactly like you have felt.

I maybe have felt similarly, but I don't know exactly what you're feeling. So I can't say, oh, well what I've been through is a lot worse than what you've been through. So you really shouldn't be struggling right now. I can't minimize what someone's going through. I also can't criticize it with a, Hey, why don't you just relax?

Or the worst calm down. No one in the history of ever has ever calmed down by being told to calm down. In fact, I'm probably more anxious now than I was before. Don't compare. Hey, I know you're struggling, but have you ever thought about how so and so's got it worse than you?

Mm. And that doesn't help me in this moment. And don't try to redirect like I know we all wanna fix. And then when we can't, it's like, oh, I wanna jump ship and get outta here. Don't say, well, let's do something else.

Let's think about something else. Instead, let's do these things. Let's commit. Commit to being there. I'm here and I'm not leaving.

I wanna connect with you. I care about how you feel. I'm gonna listen to understand and not listen to fix. And that one right there, like that hurts me because I wanna fix it all. That's literally my personality, the helper.

I want to help, I want to fix, but I just have to sit and listen and encourage, Hey, we know that God has a plan here. Maybe we don't see it, we don't know what's going on, but we know it and we believe it. And I'm gonna listen, like I said, just to listen and hear, Hey, could you maybe explain to me how you're feeling that list from before? Like how enlightening is that? Ask the person that you're sitting with, can you describe what it feels like?

I wanna understand and then just support. I'm here. I'm not going anywhere. We're gonna make it through this together. You know, that that list is, it's so humbling to see that because I think I'm guilty of everything on the don'ts.

Like, I mean literally like, hey, let me redirect the conversation to something better, more fun to talk about. Or hey, but you know, I know this is hard for you, but do you know that person over there like that, that that's just me and, and I'm learning, right? I'm wrestling with, I'm trying to get comfortable with just kind of joining people in their pain. Yeah. And that's not natural for me.

You mentioned you're two on the Enneagram, right? What number are you on the Enneagram? Two. Two. Oh great.

Yeah. A couple helpers. Yeah. So I'm the jerk. That's the seven.

And, and like we just want to, we just wanna redirect everything and we want everything to be happy and fun and sometimes we've just gotta get comfortable sitting with people that are, that are in those seasons. Okay. So one of the hardest things to do, and maybe this applies to you as a teacher or a big sister, a big brother, maybe as a parent. And this is, this is at Lee's gonna give you some numbers, but this is so true of this next generation depression. Anxiety is definitely something that the next generation is wrestling with at a really early age.

And I don't know if for my parents in the room, man, you, you have probably had a moment or you will, uh, where you'll see in your kids the beginning of some anxious behavior. You'll see some, you know, some signs of some depression that shows up in the way that they're acting. And man, there's nothing, um, that scares us more. You know, it's like, hey, the light has gone out. How do I turn it back on in my child?

Where did they go? And so I want, I want you guys to speak into that just a little bit. You know, like as parents or as a siblings, whatever, how do we take care of the people that we love when we see them beginning to deal with these these things? I read this the other day and it really kinda shocked me, but I think it's true. And it said that high school students today are battling with the same levels of anxiety and depression that people in the 1950s were being admitted to inpatient facilities for.

Think about that we are literally becoming a more anxious and depressed generation, our, our society with each passing decade. And I would say to Craig your point, I mean when kids are struggling, listen, they lack the ability to articulate why they're struggling. It usually presents itself in all these acting out behaviors. And I'm just gonna be honest with you, a lot of times as a parent, I just wanna shut the acting out behavior down as quick as possible and, and and really can sometimes get aggravated with my own kids. And here's what I'm learning is that if we really knew, if we really knew what was going on behind the acting out behavior, it more than likely would not make you angry.

It would break your heart. Kids need help articulating what's going on inside of them. And so practically I think it's good for us to pay attention to, to this first, pay attention to your own emotions when you're talking to your kid. Alright? When, like I just said, when your child's upset as an adult, we want to help a kid struggle less as quick as possible.

But if we're not careful, we're trying to manage our own emotions or whatever it is. And we can be quick to dismiss our children. So I think make some time, sit down with them, let them speak it out. Some of these same things we talked about before, but just know for a child they may not can communicate to you exactly all that's going on. So sometimes you may have to do some suggestive phrases to them.

Like what? It may be helpful just to sit down and go Hey, you know, I imagine if I experienced that I would feel really sad or scared about that. You feel that way. And a lot of times a kid will go, that's exactly how I feel. They just need some help.

Kind of putting language to it. 'Cause you can't fight a battle you can't name. And I think part of the struggle with kids is just sitting down and helping them hold space for them, make it comfortable for them. Just listen, like she said, to understand, don't listen to fix it unless that child is in some type of immediate danger. Just hold space for them and listen to 'em.

That's good. Yeah. So some practical things and hear me say this is the tip of the iceberg when we're dealing with the things in our children. Don't hear what I'm about to say as the end all be all. But I know I told you guys, I have a 9-year-old and a 4-year-old and I have noticed in my house when emotions are running the highest or the lowest, these are usually some of the things that we can do to begin to fix it.

Um, but don't hesitate to also take your child to see a counselor if these basic things aren't starting to produce any fruit, right? But, uh, the first thing to look at in my house for sure is our routines. Children, adults. I thrive off of routine, but especially I've seen in my kids when we have been out of the norm going crazy, we haven't stopped, we haven't, we've just been doing and going and busy and busy. They've been craving their routine.

So to go back and reevaluate like, hey, what is it that we have dropped? What do we need to bring back? What do we need to let go of? Whatever that looks like for you. And then also, and this, this hurts my feelings because screens are really helpful with our kids sometimes, right?

Um, but it's also one of the things that can be the most harmful, especially when it comes to those feelings of anxiety and depression. And so really digging in and like at my house we have learned there can be no screen time and I mean none before school. We are starting our day off just in chaos if we allow their little bodies to even think about a screen. And it's just because it affects them so much more than we realize. It affects us so much more than we realize.

And you know, so that's just a couple of really easy things. And then just finding time to be together at dinner. If you can't do it at breakfast, we know we're all on the go for lunch, but dinner is the one time that we can most protect. It's not always gonna happen. We all have the extracurriculars, but as much as possible, that's when I hear from my kids' hearts the most is when we're all sitting at the table, we have to look at each other and we have to have conversation.

So those are just a couple of really practical things. Yeah. So it's, it's always wild when you're, it, it works this way all the time, but when you're preparing for a message, like you'll hear things all during the week that kind of speak to it. This week I heard, I dunno if you know this, 89% of us, like at every campus of of us, 89% of us look at our phones before we get outta bed. That is staggering.

Like, I hate to tell you, you gotta go back to the alarm clock. You remember the old school alarm clock? Oh yeah man, I mean it's like, like we need one because otherwise we just, we start the day right there on our phones, 2,617 times you engage your phone with a swipe or a look or whatever. That's a lot man. And that, that kind of wears on us throughout the day.

Okay? So this, this is, this is, this is the last one y'all. I thought this was such a great question. This is a hard question, but, so why does God allow heavy seasons you've ever asked that? I know you have.

Why does God allow heavy seasons and how can I honor God in the midst of the struggle of anxiety and depression? Listen, I, I wish I had an easy answer for that. I can just tell you, I know this about all of us. We we're a pain avoidant people. If you're signing up for pain, I don't know if we can be friends, right?

We're just not pain. We're pain avoidant people. And if I could just express how I really would say what I'd say to God if I being honest, it's God I love you. I want you to use me for your kingdom, but make this as pain-free and as fun as possible. That's just how I wanna live my life.

And yet I'm always sober to the fact that, you know, when I gave my life to Jesus, here's the thing, I am no longer the most important character in my story anymore. This is no longer about me anymore. And I have to remind myself, Lee, God does allow painful seasons to occur. But there is always a promise, there's always a purpose found right in the midst of the pain. And I wanna share with you, can I just share with you a cheat code real quick, a little cheat code for you.

This is something my wife and I are picking up this year and we're beginning to do. It's a simple little three letter word that's helping us in the midst of pain. You know what the word is? It's gonna blow your socks off and a and d and and allows two things to be true at once. I can be overwhelmed, I can be anxious, I can be exhausted.

And God, I can still declare you are a good God and you're a faithful God. God, I don't know what this is gonna look like for the next few days or weeks or months in my life. And I can remember yet times where I felt the same and you've been faithful in my past. See, I love with God that he does not call us to check our humanity at the door. He says, you can be where you are.

Just invite me into that space. And so maybe, and is one way that you can live with that. And you see that really throughout the rhythm of the Psalms. Throughout the Psalms, you will see just about every author of the Psalm start the psalm this way. God, I don't hear you.

I'm overwhelmed right now. My throat is parched from crying out to you. I don't see you answering, keep reading. And yet I remember your faithfulness to me. God, you have been true.

These are the rhythms of the Psalms. And if they can pray that way and talk that way to God, I I think we should too. The power of, and that's Good. And another thing that Lee taught me about that is it matters which direction we say those things in, right? So if we start with, God, I know you're so good, but here's everything that I have going on, that's a wildly different perspective than, Hey God, here's all the things that I'm going through right now and I know that you are still good.

So exactly as he said, we're gonna read from a psalm to give you an example here. So Psalm chapter six gonna start in verse six. And I want you to listen to how raw and honest the author is with his feelings, but then to end it with the focus on God. So it says, I am weary with my moaning every night I flood my bed with tears, I drench my couch with my weeping, my eye wastes away because of my grief. It grows weak because of all my foes.

I imagine the and comes here, right? And God, I'm asking depart from me, all you workers of evil. For the Lord has heard the sound of my weeping, the Lord has heard my plea. The Lord accepts my prayer. All my enemies shall be ashamed and greatly troubled.

They shall turn back and be put to shame in a moment. So that's the example of how I wanna have a perspective going into this week for sure. That's really good. Hey, so here, here's how we want to end. I, I love this in podcast.

If you listen to many, they, they always have like at the very end a lightning round you'll ever seen that where they'll ask them, you know, typically it's random questions, but uh, I want you to know this one. You can hear more from Lee on the podcast. Alright? You can find it on the app. It's called Unschooled and Ordinary.

And uh, man, we kinda did just like a bonus episode with Lee Brandy kind of interviews him a little bit more so he can speak into this world of anxiety and depression. It gets released today. So you can find that. But, but Lee, let's finish this way, kind of a 62nd response. Alright?

What would you say to the person that's watching or listening today, that, man, this is where they are, anxiety and depression is the season for them today. Would you just give them a couple things to hold onto? Yeah, I, I wanna look straight in the camera and I wanna, I wanna just say this. Hey, listen, you are not alone. You are not alone.

And the enemy would convince you that you're alone right now in this. And he would wanna isolate you in your aloneness. You're not alone church. In fact, I would tell you some of the greatest spiritual giants and Scripture and some of the greatest spiritual giants in my own personal life have battled anxiety and depression. And so if you are battling one of those things, can you just please hear me say this?

Let today, let today be the last day you battle alone. Let today be the last day you battle alone. You are actually the most attractive person on the planet to God. Psalm 51 says, A broken and contrite spirit he will not turn away from. So let somebody in and let somebody come and minister to you in the midst of where you are and help you put a plan together.

Spirit, soul, and Body brandy, end us with this one. Like so some of us are gonna leave today and you're gonna walk home and maybe your husband, your wife, somebody is waiting there and they are in that season of anxiety and depression. And man, we're gonna do our best to bring care and bring hope. But help us know, coach us a little again, 60 seconds. How do we love them?

Well First of all, just take the pressure off. It's not on you to fix it. Your job is to sit with, to be with, to pray for, to pray with. And just love them through it. Take the pressure off.

You cannot fix it, but you can love them and you can be there. That's so good. Hey, listen, all of our campuses, let's give them a hand today just for sharing. Yeah. Hey, here's how I want to end, man.

I just wanna pray over us. Can I do that? And I just want to just pray one prayer, just church wide saying, man, we see you, we love you for this season and we wanna give you some comfort and some hope. And so we want to end our discussion just asking God to bless us. Let's pray.

God, I thank you so much for moments where we can kind of stop all that we're doing and try to speak directly into the hearts and in the homes of the people that we love. And God, today we started with your word and your word said that you will give us comfort. And so God, I pray for the one that's listening today and they are so desperate to experience some comfort. God, you also said that once we experience your comfort, that you would use us, that we're to be ambassadors, that we're to walk outta here with people who have your hope and your healing power in us. And so God help us know how to love well the people that are struggling.

Well, God, I claim your word again that says you'll be faithful to finish what you've started. That God you are near and close to the broken hearted. And so today, God give and bring comfort. Give hope. I pray that there would be someone that's listening today that would find some encouragement outta these words.

They would be able to lay their head down tonight and they would find some peace and some rest. And this would be the last day that they would suffer even just in silence, that they would allow us the church to come around them and love them. God, I thank you that you see us, that you love us and that you have a plan for us. And so God, we trust you with that. It's in your name we pray.

Amen.